Jump

says my heart,

as I step 

onto

the ledge.

Don’t be stupid,

say my head.

Fuck, I expected

you

to be somewhat more

clever.

For once.

Are you seventeen?

Do you even

know this man?

Has this got

something

to do with your

hormones?

I step back from the ledge.

Fear, doubt and

past hurt

rushes in.

I really am

being

stupid.

And so

I turn 

to leave.

Back to safety.

To my

quiet, lonely,

perfectly

safe

life.

Bye.

This was fun.

And thank you

for the

fish.

It’s the pain

in my chest

that 

brings me

back.

That and the

bitter tears

stuck in

the back of my 

throat.

I was born for 

this.

Fuck safety,

as I step

over 

the ledge.

~Lu