When (5)

the craving

hits

I’m completely

unprepared

for

the visceral

impact

it has on 

my body.

I feel.

I feel the longing.

I feel the yearnings

of my heart.

I feel the near

stupor of my 

brain,

and when she’s

eventually able

to find language,

she’s deeply disappointed,

and quite mortified

by the silly teenage

notion

that I seem to 

be

stuck in.

I am missing

my 

boyfriend

because I’m 

listening to 

a playlist,

really just a few 

songs,

that he curated,

for me,

no for us.

Grow the fuck up

and face the everyday

reality of an

adult woman

driving to the office

to get stuff done,

she screams, 

while my heart

simply shrugs

and 

turns up the volume

on the car radio.

Tears are perfectly

fine

at 6.02am.

~Lu